So recently I've been on a few dates with this one guy. I'm going to call him IT guy because he works with computers and is kinda geeky (which is totally my type), but really nice and fun. The problem is, he has this one really annoying habit that is really the only thing I don't like about him so far... He tries to finish/repeat the ends of my sentences. I don't think he's trying to do this to be cute or something. It's a habit he doesn't even realize he has. But it drives me up the freaking wall. It's like where most people would say "mmhmmm" or "yeah," he either tries to complete your sentence before you or just repeats the last few words. I will put an example below, with his words in parentheses( ). And keep in mind, there are times when he does this to me in practically every sentence, then there are times when he doesn't do it much at all. But when he is doing it a lot it drives me crazy. So, an example (these aren't exact examples, but hopefully you'll get the gist):

"So I went and saw Inception and it was re - (really cool) ally awesome (really awesome. Oh yeah? I really want to see it). Yeah, I was very im - (impressed) pressed with the action (oh the action) and with special effects (special effects), and the way it makes you think (make you think) more than most typic - (typical action movies) al action movies."

It might be hard to make you understand how annoying that is in writing. I mean, really, I am glad to know he's listening and all - maybe that's why he does it: to prove to girls that he's really listening - but it drives me CRAZY. Can't you just say "mmhmmm" like everyone else or nod or something? STOP REPEATING EVERYTHING I SAY!!! And I'm really hoping I can get past this, because I really like him other than this one thing (well, and he's not a perfect kisser, but he's certainly not bad and he seems like he can adapt).

I have to close this post by saying that How I Met Your Mother is one of the most true to dating (particularly in NYC) shows that I have ever seen. Despite how ridiculous the situations they find themselves in may seem, the basic lessons they espouse are SO TRUE. I will probably relate many of my dating experiences to How I Met Your Mother throughout this blog. There's an episode (Season 3, Episode 8 - "Spoiler Alert") where Ted is dating this girl that he thinks is totally perfect and he introduces her to his friends and they don't really like her but they won't say why because they don't want to ruin it for him, because they know that's all he'll be able to think about after they point out that one little habit of hers. Throughout the show they go through past examples and every time they tell the annoying habit of another person, there is a shattered glass sound as the person realizes that they're right and they're opinion of the other person as perfect is shatterd. Ted's girl talks too much and as soon as he realizes it, he can't date her anymore. Unfortunately I didn't need a friend to point out this thing, but I'm hoping it doesn't turn out to be my "Spoiler Alert" that keeps me from pursuing this guy that I really like otherwise. Who knows, if the annoyance doesn't wear off, maybe I can point it out to him (cue glass shattering noise) and maybe he can try to cut down on it. We shall see.

Anyone else experienced that one annoying habit that becomes a deal breaker? If so, what was it?

It's been a long time. Almost a year. I don't know if I'm going to stay, as I am rather short on time and I already have way too many other projects for which I don't get paid, but I thought I would give this a shot again. Since I last wrote, I broke up once again with the army guy (my long-distance guy - we broke up and got back together in the course of my past stint on this blog I do believe), but we're still kind of seeing each other. It's complicated. And I don't know how much I'm going to write about it. In looking back at this blog, I am actually quite proud of my last few posts (particularly the one about why some women stay in abusive relationships and also the one about nice guys who hate women and then wonder why women won't date them) and I would like to write more things like that - thoughtful posts about the dating process sprinkled with bits of humor here and there to lighten the mood.

But I am also embarking on the dating scene again, and I will be writing anecdotes about that here and there, which will hopefully be much more entertaining than my current quasi-relationship drama with my ex. So there you have it.

It's been a while since I've written... Guess I've been busy! That and I just haven't been sure what to write because my love life is overly complicated right now. But so the reason I am writing today is because it's not about me, so it's easier to know what to write.

I have this friend. All in all he's a good guy. He took me to the hospital once and stayed there with and then made sure I got home safe and sound afterward. We've been through a lot together. But he can be the most negative, self-pitying, whiny sonofabitch I think I've ever met. He's a relationship kind of guy who has been single for about a year and a half now, after a very serious relationship that went very seriously wrong (she cheated and did all sorts of other not so nice things). And whenever he's single, he becomes somewhat intolerable because all he does is bitch about how women suck and how poor him all women are liars who say they like nice guys but don't actually like nice guys and it's bullshit and why doesn't he have a girlfriend when he hasn't done anything wrong, yadda yadda yadda.

Honestly, there are times I want to slap him around a little and tell him to snap out of it. First off, you are doing things wrong. I know I write about this alot, but I'm just so sick of hearing guys complain that girls don't like nice guys because it's absolutely not true. Girls like nice guys. What we don't like is insecure guys who feel sorry for themselves and bash women. If you think that all women are lying, coniving bitches, then of course you're not going to get one. Why would you even want one? But apparently you still do since you're whining about it. Secondly, confidence is sexy. And no, that's not bullshit. I don't want to date a guy who is constantly making me validate his self-esteem or is really clingy because he's afraid that if he let's you out of his sight, you'll find someone better. I want to date a guy who is independent, positive, not down on himself, etc. I can't deal with insecure guys, and for some reason a lot of nice guys are insecure (it might have to do with the fact that assholes are assholes partially because they are overly confident). And I realize this sounds cheesy, but if you don't love yourself, why should anyone else love you? You need to be ok with who you are and not care what other people think of you. As endearing as it can be to date someone who's constantly looking for your approval, it gets old after about 5 minutes. Although, paradoxically, nice guys have seem to have high self-esteem in some regards by the simple virtue that they refer to themselves as "nice guys" and "good people." So I'm not really sure why they're so insecure if they think so highly of themselves.

Third, self-pity in particular is extremely unattractive. My friend seems to think he's the only one who's had his heart broken and that he's the only one with baggage. I want to shake him and yell "everyone has baggage! GET OVER IT! IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU SPECIAL!" Everyone has gone through heart break and heartbreak is all relative so while your situation may sound worse on paper, that doesn't mean it was actually more difficult for you. So stop feeling sorry for yourself. You will meet someone special eventually. You will not be alone forever. But it's going to be a lot longer if you keep ranting about how much you hate women and hate your life.

Also, talking to women helps. My friend bitches that he hasn't met anyone in the last year and a half but he doesn't really make an effort to meet new women and he's not interested in dating any of the girls he's already friends with. So many nice guys don't take the steps they need to actually pursue women. They seem to think that just because they are nice, women should automatically fall madly in love with them, even when the woman has received no signal that the guy is even remotely interested. Guess what guys, we need signals. We need you to show interest. Otherwise we are not going to waste our time and we are going to move on to someone who is showing interest in us.